I admire Amanda Palmer

Amanda Palmer.

This name has been on my radar for years. My longtime friend Kodi has been raving about her music and her work for as long as I have been on Twitter. I kept meaning to find out who she is.. but I just never got around to it.

My journey to Amanda Palmer is a little bit convoluted.

It all started when my little brother, TeeJay, introduced me to Doctor Who and The Vlog Brothers. I became a huge fan of DW, and a passive observer of Hank and John Green. This past fall, TeeJay came into the possession of three tickets to An Evening of Awesome at Carnegie Hall. He gifted two of those tickets to Jesse and I for Christmas.

One of the many fabulous people included in this celebration collaboration, positivity, art, and all-around good feels, was Neil Gaiman, a man I knew as a writer for Doctor Who.

Neil, I later learned, is both a fantastically amazing writer and Amanda Palmer's husband. Now I really needed to find out who this woman is.

So I followed her on Twitter as well.

And then I found her music.

And then I saw her TED Talk.

And then I was fully enraptured.



What I admire about Amanda is her honesty and the way she connects. Her tweets are conversations. Her blog entries are insights into her mind. Her music is the thoughts you won't let out for fear of judgment. But she let's it all out. She sees her fans and she loves them. She truly appreciates her fans - not in the "Thanks for making me rich" way, either. She gives and receives graciously and humbly. If more people knew had to say "please" and "thank you" the way Amanda does, the world would be a lot better off.






What do you think of Amanda's TED Talk? What do you think of her art and her following?

I'm never buying tampons again

Warning! I'm about to talk about my period.

I have never been a big fan of tampons or pads. I find them uncomfortable and borderline unreliable. Plus, you have to be vigilant about changing them, lest you leak or fall victim to toxic shock syndrome. On top of that, if you don't remember to restock your supply regularly, you are left scrambling around the ladies room trying beg a spare off a stranger or MacGyvering some toilet paper to get you through the rest of the day.

I'm done with that.

About four months ago I took the plunge and bought a Diva Cup. For several years, friends in the outdoor recreation program at Rutgers raved to me about how great the Diva Cup is. I was hesitant at first (and discouraged by a squeamish ex - but that's another story). On a whim, I gave it a try.

The Diva Cup is more comfortable than a tampon or pad. It's made of silicone, so it's flexible, non-drying, and easy to clean. It's as easy to insert as a tampon (though, fair warning, there is no applicator), and feels more secure. In the four months I've had it I have never had a leak, nor have I felt it would fall out. A big plus is you only need to change it about once a day. Most women will find they only need to change it every two or three days. It doesn't dry you out or grow bacteria, so it's comfortable and safe for long periods of time - perfect for traveling or sports. As for care, just give it a wash in the sink and you're good to go. Since you don't need to change it every few hours, you don't have to do this in a public restroom.

Long story short, I'm not going back to disposable feminine sanitary products.

Have you tried the Diva Cup? What do you think? What's stopping you from checking it out?

Do you like things that are delicious?

Then check out the blog Jesse and I created where he makes yummy things for me to eat:

Feeding My Love

Yoga, Wine, and Chocolate

I have a truly amazing boyfriend. He cooks, he supports, he'd punch somebody in the face if I asked him to (but only if I asked him to because he knows I can take care of myself), and he knows me better than anyone else.

Case in point: A month and a half ago, he informed me that we would be going on a surprise date in early February. The week of, he gave me three potential outfits I should wear. The morning of the big surprise he told me to wear my yoga clothes. Ah, I thought, a yoga date.

Unfortunately, at this point in the story it had been snowing for about eight hours straight and wasn't showing any signs of stopping. When Jesse learned we would have to reschedule, he let me in on the secret.

Yoga. At a winery. With a chocolate tasting. (Jesse said that if he were custom-designing a date for me, this would be it. Maybe with some cheese, but let's not get ahead of ourselves.)

And we had to wait another month for the next opportunity!

When the big day finally rolled around, it was heavenly. Old York Cellars in Ringoes, New Jersey was hosting the even in its special events space. The room was small but spacious, just the right size for an intimate yoga session. A gas fire place set a cozy mood. Tosia, a well-established local yoga instructor led the beginner level class. She moved throughout the room as we rotated on our mats, ensuring that everyone could see and hear her. We worked up to headstand practice where I, for the first time, successfully held a tripod headstand for more than a moment! I have been working towards this for three months. In my excitement I called for Jesse's attention. I got it - right as I fell with a smack on my back. I quickly explained that I wasn't looking for him to catch me - I wanted to show him my headstand!

After savasana, that delicious moment of peace at the end of every practice, we threw our layers back on and walked across the gravel drive to the tasting room. The representative from OYC indulged us with a wide variety of samples. Each wine was complimented with a piece of chocolate. Yum!

If you are visiting Old York Cellars I recommend the following wines:

• 2011 Pinot Gris - you definitely taste the apricot notes
• 2011 Cabernet Sauvignon - I enjoyed the berry-like taste and the hint of spice
• Ravat 51 - it's like a wine pina colada in the best way
• Blackberry - not too sweet, with a pronounced tartness that was very well complimented by the chocolate
• 2010 Southpaw Red Port - I am by no means a wine expert; for example, this wine tasted like bacon to me

If you are making the trip anyway, definitely sign up for the yoga series. It's a little bit of heaven.

PS - I fully intended on taking pictures, but then I was too busy having an awesome time. 

Quitting Facebook

Early in February my emotional state was hitting critical mass. I was feeling unimportant, unsuccessful, and boring. After talking with Jesse a little bit, I realized that a primary source of these problems was Facebook.

I was measuring my life in likes, seeking approval and validation in the comments. When a peer posted a picture of her new haircut, I would instantly compare myself to her, wondering why her profile picture had so many more likes than mine. I felt ugly. When people stopped telling me how cool I looked on Facebook, I felt boring. It had been a while since I had posted a picture of myself on top of a mountain. Did this mean I was no longer worthy of attention? According to my perception of myself on Facebook, yes.

As my newsfeed was filled up with Thirsty Thursdays and weekend trips to Atlantic City, I felt left out. Why wasn't anyone inviting me out to the bar? Why wasn't I on the short list for a weekend at the beach house? I felt as though my life should match the highlight reel that everyone posts on Facebook.

So, without any announcement or build up, I quit. After using Facebook for over 7 years, I expected to crave it, to feel like I was out of the loop. Honestly, though, it's been easy. I am still tempted to type "facebook.com" into my url bar, but not because I want to know what's going on. I do it out of habit. Then, I stop and realize that I don't care.

When I want to know what my friends are doing - friends, not "friends" - I ask them. I text them. I email them. Maybe I'll tweet them on Twitter. I even started a pen-pal relationship with an old friend on the west coast. It has been a fun challenge. I am no longer passively interacting with people I barely know. I am actively engaging my friends.

Quitting Facebook has also caused me to reevaluate my friendships. Who is worth the time? Who are acquaintances and who are friends? I've let a few people slip into the "acquaintance" category, and I've bumped others up into the "I want to be friends with this person so I'm going to make the effort" category. It takes a lot of effort, I've realized, to make friends and keep friends. It's so much more than a friend request.

Did quitting Facebook solve all my self-esteem issues? Absolutely not. But it did limit the triggers. Sometimes I miss the ability to reach a large audience quickly (have ya'll seen my new project Feeding My Love?), but I like the privacy I am now afforded. I don't feel compelled to tell everyone everything. I feel a little more comfortable being me.

Are you thinking about quitting Facebook? Have you pulled the plug already? Tell me about it in the comments section!

Top 10 most read books in the world

This infographic worries me. There are some expected classics up there... and then there's the Twilight series. I think the possibility that Twilight has been read by more people than The Diary of Anne Frank explains a lot about the world today, especially the state of American women and girls. Thank goodness for Hermione.